We’re making progress now. Our experiments are going well, and the data we’re collecting rivals what we collected during the accident, but we’re still no closer to finding a cure. With Marta gone, I can focus on my work and really consider the problem. We have been able to find a way to make our current weapons more powerful, thanks to Subject 1, but the cure still eludes me.
I’m not actually sure this is a solvable problem. I’m beginning to think it isn’t.
No one has mentioned Marta’s absence, and I’m not surprised. Everyone knows not to ask when someone goes missing. Some of the staff probably suspected that she was… weakening. Yet, I don’t think of Marta as weak.
She wasn’t. She was treasonous but never weak. However, she was weak and treasonous. That’s just a fact.
And I can’t afford to be weak now either. If I am, I won’t get out of this alive.
I received new orders today, not just new orders, but she came herself to tell me. I’ve never met her in person before. It was… surreal. I’ve been ordered to make a weapon. It is odd. I had thought that the cure was of the utmost importance. It is, and it should be. Making more weapons is valuable, I understand that from a military point of view, but we have enough to protect ourselves for the moment. I should be spending my time on the cure, and I told her that. She said things have changed and that creating a weapon was the most important thing now. But how could anything be more important than the cure?
I tried to argue. I really did.
When that didn’t work, I tried to reason with her. I’ve dedicated my life to this cure, and she obviously knows the importance of it. So why would she want to give up on it now? I didn’t sign up to make weapons. That’s another department. I only ever wanted to do my job, to learn and understand the greatest of all mysteries. I have no interest in politics and wars, but I am being ordered to ignore my own beliefs and to create a thing of death.
But when she commands, we obey.
I will do it. Of course, I will do it, we always do what she says. But when this is over, I will go back to studying those great mysteries and searching for…
Marta would say hope, but that’s not right. There is no hope in this country. Truth maybe, maybe I can find truth. That’s close enough to hope, isn’t it?
It doesn’t matter, though, what I’m searching for. Orders are orders. That’s what I told Marta before they took her away, so it must be true.
They took Subject 1. I wasn’t there when it happened, but I arrived this morning, and she was gone. They just… took her. I just missed them, one of the assistants told me. They just came and wheeled her out like it was nothing like she was just another potted plant to be placed in the sunshine somewhere else. The assistants tried to contact me, but they were told the order to remove Subject 1 came from the highest levels. Her. Of course, it did. Where else would it come from?
All the same, Subject 1 was my responsibility, my experiment, and they just took her. There’s more going on here, but I don’t know what it is. I’m completely in the dark. Why take Subject 1? She’s not needed in the field. We can already use what we’ve learned from her to make other weapons, so why take Subject 1? What makes her so special?